More productive, conscious and mindful way of living challenge

It all started with a growing frustration over my idle habits and a desire to become a better person. To be better tomorrow than I was yesterday, a week ago, or one year ago. “Better” is rather arrogant word but it sort of summarizes all the points I am going to mention further, so I will use it for now.

I should probably start by describing my personality. An irrational 32-year old with an attention span of a monkey and a 1GB system memory in the era of 32GBs growing like mushrooms after the rain, I am one of those people who try to open their apartment door with their car keys, arrive at the airport at 12 am instead of 12 pm, stop in the middle of the road and then realize they ran out of gas... I forget things, confuse things and never finish things.

My imagination, on the contrary, rarely fails and during the course of a day I can live multiple exciting life scenarios in my imaginary world, where I am either an artist, or a musician, or a writer; where I travel the world and make a difference; where I succeed at any ventures. In reality, I hardly accomplish anything, jumping from one thing to another, being constantly late, procrastinating profusely and never keep up with my routine. My lists of to do things and resolutions are endless, hardly ever getting fulfilled. Why? Dreaming is fun and easy. Doing and accomplishing is hard, tedious and often frightening.

The other day I read an article about super achievers. Their main secret was the ability to Not multitask and concentrate on one project at a time. The second trick was to avoid over thinking and bubbling up emotions inside. If there were such phenomenon as the absolute truth, it would be the fact that I am the queen of all unproductive multitaskers, overthinkers, proctastinators and bubbling emotions keepers!

My current version of living a healthy life and exercising resembles a fortune wheel. I eat pizza with a coke and then make a healthy smoothie to balance it out. I run in the morning, drink fresh squeezed juices, go rollerblading (occasionally J) and then end up the day drinking wine and smoking. Yes, I smoke. I am not a heavy smoker, more of a social one, but the fact stays the same. I don’t exercise regularly. I live blindly in regards to many aspects, being a mindless vandal for my own health.

Do I really believe all those things are so horrible? No, I don’t think so. My life is easy and effortless and I enjoy it this way a lot! Or rather, enjoyed. Until it started feeling tiresome and insufficient, even blank at times. I simply became anxious and less happy for no apparent reason. My life didn’t make the cut anymore.

It took me a while to realize what was wrong and why it felt like I was going in the wrong direction. I knew I needed a change but where, what and how remained a mystery. I am still not sure I am on the right track, but it feels exciting enough to at least try undertaking.

So here comes the challenge and the list of things (yet another one on top of my never ending piles of lists J) I plan on accomplishing. Not at once. Little by little, organically and without any dramatic changes. I want to go with a flow but to adhere to set goals. I will try to overview my journey regularly on the blog. And by the way, blogging about it is something I do for myself mostly, as seeing my goals in an organized post encourages me to commitment.

So, this is my manifest. It really is highly challenging for me, as it deals with discipline and self restraining.

I should mention, that for the periods of travels I’ve decided to set myself free from any commitments and to experience other cultures to the fullest, including trying of any foods or activities, even if they don’t fall under my set goals. It does sound like having double standards, but it makes sense to me and eases rather overwhelming anticipation of this self-imposed transition.

I hope this journey will be fun! (fun has huge value in my universe J)

Thank you for taking interest in reading this post! 

(pictures were made recently when me and my boyfriend tried our new toys - inflatable kayaks and stand up paddle board)